Don't Get Married...Yet! (pt. 1)

Don't do it yet! I know you heard me. This might be shocking to you, but the reality is you may not be ready to get married just yet. Imagine me standing in front of you, shaking you by the shoulders saying “Wake up, wake up!”  Don’t take it personal.  We need to step back and consider some things especially because of the the divorce rates, the parentless children, the financial responsibility, the broken marriages, and even married people that live in the same house and don’t even like each other.  Need I go on.   No one planned to be in those situations.  All these things should cause you pause.  In our blog series we will explore seven key principles that must be examined and applied before saying I do.

Principle #1 - Know God

Here is a question that you need to answer, “Do you know God?”  Let me be clear. The question is not, “Do you know about God?”  The question is, “Do you know God, personally, intimately?”  In the book of Genesis, we find that God created Adam and was alone with Adam before He created Eve.  God and Adam toured the garden together, God gave Adam the privilege of naming every animal, and gave him a job to dress and keep the garden, all before Eve was ever in the picture.  Now in the opening chapters of the Bible it does not go into detail about the length of time that God walked and talked with Adam. It does not go into the specifics regarding the instructions or the multiplicity of names that Adam gave the animals. But what we do know is that Adam was alone with God before he knew Eve. And if you think about it, when God put Adam to sleep and took the woman from his rib, the woman was alone with God.

So here is the simple application of what that story tells us. Before Adam knew Eve or before Eve knew Adam, they both knew God.   In this day and age, there seems to be a great rush to marry and unite with others before there is a true knowledge of God.  Foundationally this is the reason why marriages are not fulfilling the purpose they were designed to fulfill. I am not saying that you will ever know God perfectly.  But that which He has already revealed or is offering to you should be accepted and applied in your life. Without this knowledge of God, you cannot and should not be married just yet.

You may be asking the question, “How do I know I know God?”  In order to answer that question we need to look at the representative of God,  Jesus.   I John 4:8 states, “…he that loveth not knoweth not God, for God is love.”   Jesus stated that, “If you have seen Me then you have see the Father”.  Now for a moment I want you to review the life of Jesus.  Everything that Jesus did was an example of love in action.  His death on the cross was a symbol of great love for a people who loved Him not.  Love is demonstrated in sacrifice.  Can you see why this becomes so important?  You see, Jesus is showing by example, that love can be seen in sacrifice.  As two people partner, the spirit of self-sacrifice is foundational to loving and lasting relationships.  If the most powerful being in the universe is willing to humble Himself, why wouldn’t humanity humble itself in service?   It is selfishness in relationships that destroy the peace that otherwise would have prevailed in the home.    

Jesus says, “If you love me, keep my commandments.”  Love awakens love. If love is demonstrated by sacrifice and I see that sacrifice it would not be as hard to yield to the wishes of the one I know loves me equal to or even above themselves. If one goes into marriage thinking that the marriage itself it will create love or you can “make love” then reality is you will not have love. The Bible tells us in first John 4:8 that, “ he that loveth not knoweth not God for God is love.” The source of love is God therefore if you know God then you know love. And if you know love then you can share in that love with the person that you are covenanting to be married to.

Remember to Know God is to Know love and if there is No God there is No love. Know God my friends. Blessings.